On our first wedding anniversary, we had a big night where we honoured each other’s children and in the role they play in our family and the acknowledgement that they were a key part of our married life. Broken into the areas of commitment, here is what we committed to them along with the amazing input of celebrant, Deborah Lilley.
Our Commitments to Each Other’s Children
For each of each other’s children, Jeremy and Kristy made the following commitments in front of family and friends.
Bonus Parent: I commit to supporting your individual journey of faith, encouraging your trust in God’s promises for your life. I will strive to be a testimony in my life that God can be relied upon in all circumstances. I will encourage you to look to God for the support you seek in all that you strive to achieve because I know that your Heavenly Father is persistent, present and consistent. I commit to supporting you in having a real and present relationship with the Lord that will be a testimony to others in your life also.
Bonus Parent: Our coming together as a family provides us with an opportunity to have a common vision and share our dreams for both ourselves as individuals, and as a group. I commit to seeing you learn how people working together can achieve so much more than we can on our own. I will role model this to you in how we work together as a family to create a home that is built together in love for each other. I commit to showing you that actively demonstrating that working together and loving each other creates a secure and safe foundation to base your life upon.
Bonus Parent: Truth is the foundation of trust in relationships. Even when the truth might hurt or be hard to hear I commit to telling it to you. I will demonstrate to you that speaking the truth is never as painful as the discovered lie. I commit to telling you the truth in every circumstance, abandoning lies, secrets and omissions but always having space for the occasional surprise. You deserve this as my example of telling the truth in love in all things.
Bonus Parent: I acknowledge that you are different to your siblings. You have been beautifully and uniquely made. It is in those God given differences that your individual personalities, gifts, talents and abilities shine. I commit to equipping you for life in a way that honours your unique nature and to support you in the pursuit of your dreams and the passions of your heart. Also, I commit to helping you learn to see the unique and beautiful nature of others so that you can honour who God created them to be also.
Bonus Parent: As you achieve your goals through your life you will need the empowerment to get there. I commit to being there for you as your advocate and supporter through all you put your hand and heart to. I will do all I can to provide you with the encouragement, knowledge, wisdom, my time, and to resource you in the pursuit of your vision. At times it will include supporting you in the refinement of your vision to ensure that it is walked out in love of God and the people he has placed in your life and you will be held to account with loving rebuke to hold you on a path that serves God’s plan for our community. Most importantly, I commit to supporting you in all things through prayer.
Bonus Parent: Knowing how to love someone and to cherish who they are is a critical life skill. To find and foster love in a committed relationship takes mindfulness and deliberate action. I commit to helping you learn what romance looks like through the role modelling of my relationship with your mother/father. I commit to demonstrating walking together with shared values and a shared vision and the power that God instils into a relationship built with Him as the foundation. I commit to giving you opportunities to develop the skills needed to maintain a healthy, long-lasting relationship through the activities of our family life: to enjoy the company of each other through play, dance, games, family projects, holidays, chores as well supporting those of our family through life’s challenges. I will also role model to you loving acceptance by being a safe person for you to retreat to for comfort at times when you need it.
Bonus Parent: As you grow each year you will face new challenges and will find new personal victories. I commit to enabling you to flourish in your endeavours. I will be there for you to support but also to help you overcome behaviours that hold you back from being the best you can be. This might mean giving you advice that you don’t agree with but I promise to share with you from wisdom and with the best in mind for you and your life.
Bonus Parent: Already you know that life’s commitments need to balance out. You know that you need time for all the important things in life. from learning and work to teamwork, play and rest as well as making time for others in our lives. I commit to being there as you plan your time to include all these things and to help you decide on your priorities. I will also role model to you the importance of knowing God’ will for your life and to keep that perspective that people are important and that loving them is more important than anything else the world offers us. I will show you that loving others is what makes life beautiful and worthwhile.